walla walla

Make A Move On Someone’s Prison Bitch

If it ain’t yours, leave it alone. Jealousy is a motherfucker no matter where you’re at.

Back in the mid 90’s there was this punk running around Walla Walla. He went by the name Tiffany.

Tiffany was in a relationship with Shadow. Tiffany is white, Shadow is Mexican. For months the two lived together. Until one day administration broke up the two.

Tiffany got moved into a different cell. Inside his new cell lived Terry. Terry has been in prison for years and has several more to go.

It wasn’t long before Terry was butt-fucking Tiffany and making him suck his dick. Tiffany told Shadow. Shadow was pissed.

Shadow approached Terry out in the yard and said, “Hey man, Tiffany is my bitch. Leave her alone.”

Terry laughed and said, “Her? That punk has a dick bigger than yours.”

Shadow wasn’t laughing. “Just stay away from her, alright?”

Terry’s face got serious, “That punk is in my cell now. I’ll do whatever I want, whenever I want.”

Shadow pointed his finger at Terry’s face and said, “If you touch her one more time, we’re going to war.” Then Shadow walked away.

That night Terry butt-fucked Tiffany for hours. He was extra loud and abusive. Shadow could hear everything through the open bars. Everyone could hear. Everyone knew war was on the horizon.

The next day everyone was in the yard. The tension was so thick you could cut it with a knife. On one side of the yard all the white boys gathered. And on the other side were all the Mexicans.

Shadow walked to the center of the yard as he called out Terry’s name. Terry emerged from the white crowd. The second the two got face to face, it was on and fists were flying. Shadow landed a solid punch, knocking Terry to the ground. As he tried to get to his feet, Shadow kicked him in the face knocking him out.

Shadow then proceeded to stomp on Terry’s head and neck. That’s when all the white boys came rushing in. That’s when all the Mexicans came rushing in. The whites were out numbered 3 to 1 as a massive brawl ensued.

The guards were going crazy up in the gun towers as they yelled “Break it up…get on the ground” through the PA system. The verbal command didn’t work. That’s when canisters of tear gas littered the yard. But the convicts continued to fight.

Gunshots ripped through the air as bullets thumped into the ground. This caused the convicts to scatter and find a place to lay face down. After about 4 minutes of mayhem, the brawl was under control.

Terry was beat the fuck up! The Mexicans easily fended off the white boys while Shadow continued to stomp out Terry.

Moral of the story: Keep your dick in your pants and don’t try to steal someone’s prison bitch.

 

-Steven Jennings

SIT IN THE WRONG SEAT

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Convicts want to control as much as they can. Back in the day (prior to 2004), everyone sat in the same seat at the chow hall. New guys were constantly getting ran off until they found a seat that could be theirs day in & day out. This caused so much drama, that prison officials now enforce assigned seating.

Back in 1992, at the Washington State Penitentiary in Walla Walla, there was a new guy that went by the nickname “Cat Piss.” Seriously! He introduced himself as “Cat Piss.” Why? Because he cooked so much meth, and he used so much meth, that he literally smelled like cat piss. It continued to ooze from his pores and scalp, even months after he got locked up.

His first day at the Washington State Penitentiary, Cat Piss sat in the wrong seat. Cat Piss is about 6’4” and 200 lbs.

Matt approached him and said, “This seat is taken. Go ahead and finish your meal, but don’t sit here again.”

Cat Piss just looks at Matt, then continues to eat. Matt dumps his tray and leaves without ever sitting down.

Matt is about 6’ and 190 lbs. He is in prison for robbing and stabbing to death a pill dealer. He got 60 years. When he was 27 years old.

The next day Matt comes to the chow hall to find Cat Piss in his seat again. Matt says, “Hey man, I was nice enough to let you finish your meal yesterday. But today, you need to get the fuck outta my seat.”

Cat Piss stands up and towers over Matt. Matt backs up and re-thinks the situation. Then he says, “Look man, just find another seat. I won’t tell you again.”

Matt dumps his tray and leaves again without eating.

A few hours go by, and its chow time again. And sure enough, Cat Piss is sitting in Matt’s seat. Matt doesn’t say a word. He walks up behind Cat Piss and pulls out a razor sharp 3 inch plexiglass shank. Before Cat Piss can react, Matt has stabbed him in the side three times. Then four five six seven…

Matt has Cat Piss on the ground as he grips his hair with his left hand and drives the shank in & out of Cat Piss’s mid-section. By the time the guards break it up, Cat Piss has been stabbed over 40 times. And that’s how Matt got the nickname “Slash.”

Moral of the story: Don’t come to prison and disrupt the flow of things. Find an empty seat, and get in where you fit in.